WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump has announced his latest legislative proposal, the Passage of Time Act 2025, a bill that would establish the Department of Time, a government agency tasked with monitoring and managing the passage of time. Trump, in characteristic style, emphasized the urgency of the legislation, declaring, “There’s no time to waste!”
The Vision for the Department of Time
The proposed Department of Time, a cornerstone of Trump's second-term agenda, is intended to "ensure that time is used efficiently and equitably across the nation." According to the legislation, the department would oversee daylight saving time adjustments, regulate time zones, and, in Trump’s words, “make sure every American gets the best time possible, all the time.”
Trump elaborated on the plan during a press conference, “This country has been losing time—valuable time—for far too long. We waste it; we don’t appreciate it. The Department of Time will fix that. It’s going to be fantastic. The best time management system in the world. Believe me.”
Kamala Harris’s Influence
Insiders reveal that the Passage of Time Act 2025 was created upon the urging of former Vice President Kamala Harris, who has long been an advocate for addressing the significance of time on a national scale. Harris’s passion for the concept of time is well-documented.
Harris famously said: “Today is today, and yesterday was today yesterday. Tomorrow will be today tomorrow. I can’t wait for tomorrow after today to begin shaping the future today.”
Speculation is now swirling that Harris may be nominated as the inaugural Secretary of Time. When asked about the possibility, Trump acknowledged her involvement, stating, “Kamala’s been big on time for a long time. She urged this legislation, and it’s a good idea. Whether she’ll be Secretary of Time? We’ll see. She’s got a real knack for it. Especially wasting it.”
A Call for Quick Passage
Trump has called on Congress to prioritize the Passage of Time Act, stating that time is a finite resource that cannot be squandered. “We’re already running out of time, literally. Every second that passes is a second we can’t get back,” Trump said. “Congress needs to act quickly. Let’s get this done faster than anyone’s ever seen before.”
Criticism and Support
Critics of the proposal have raised concerns about government overreach, questioning the necessity of a Department of Time. “This is just another bloated bureaucracy in the making,” said one Republican senator. Meanwhile, others argue that time management is an essential issue that deserves federal attention.
Supporters of the bill, however, point to the potential benefits of a centralized authority on time-related matters. “If we don’t take control of time, who will?” one supporter quipped.
The Clock Is Ticking
With Trump’s strong backing, and Harris’s fingerprints all over the bill, the Passage of Time Act 2025 is expected to move quickly through Congress and be law within a matter of weeks. “We’re on the clock, America,” Trump declared. “Let’s make time great again.”
Whether the Department of Time will prove to be a timely solution or a ticking time bomb remains to be seen, but one thing is certain: President Trump and Kamala Harris are determined to leave their mark on the sands of time.